Gottman Referral Network

About

Most couples don't come to therapy because they've stopped caring. They come because caring no longer gets them through the same fight again.

I'm trained through Level 3 of the Gottman Method and have spent several years collaborating closely with a Certified Gottman Therapist on cases. The Gottman research gives our work its structure: a thorough assessment, a clear picture of the patterns driving your conflict, and practical skills for repair, influence, and friendship.

But skills are hardest to use when you need them most. In a heated moment, a protective part of you can take over: the one that shuts down, the one that argues the case, the one that has to be right. Internal Family Systems helps each partner get to know these parts and what they're protecting, so you can lead the conversation instead of your reactions. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy adds the other half. You learn to make room for hard feelings without letting them decide for you, and to act on what you value about your relationship. Together, these approaches make the Gottman tools work under pressure.

Some couples arrive with one partner leaning out. As a Certified Discernment Counselor, I offer a brief, structured process to help you get clarity about the relationship's future before deciding whether to commit to couples therapy.

Before becoming a therapist, I taught humanities and worked in VA and community mental health settings. My style is direct, curious, and collaborative. I'll tell you what I'm seeing, and we'll decide together what to do with it.

I'm Clinical Director at The Relationship Place in San Diego and see couples in person and online throughout California and Texas.

Special populations

Mixed-agenda couples / one partner leaning out. Men in relationships. 50+ Couples.